breath

it is obvious that it is time for me to leave... the arrangements are complicated, but evidently, i do not belong anywhere i have known. i have a chance here... but where will my path take me? i know i am alone in this decision... i refuse to rebel against my better self... even though i often try to stray... i caught the other's scent today, filled with vile and envious thoughts. He doesn't know just how disgusting the other was... it is not my place to spread that rumor.... i have my own plights

there is no place for me

promiscuous...

the burning of branches and leaves fills my lungs, the flames lick at the edges of the living trees... ah, so beautiful... i saw another creature last night, he was not of our kind... but not human... i could see in his eyes he held great pain, but what was he, it plagues me and i am overly fascinated by this mystery creature and i wonder what He would think of the creature, would He figure out its nature??? the humans feeding the flame have noticed me through my windows, which also entertains me, i can read their thoughts tonight easily, they are begging for a true glimpse of my face. i wish and dream for a true companion, maybe i would be less conspicuous if i had a male counterpart to play a role beside me. maybe the males would look at me differently... but it is difficult to find a proper human to bring over and even so, i am much too small to be breathing life into a new one... maybe i will find Him soon, but it is not easy, he hides well within himself... how did i ever come to live in this house... time to move on i believe

centipedes

i hear a woman's laughter and a child asking a question... constant automobiles moving, water dripping, clocks ticking. i become more dizzy each instant, my skin itches and aches... my head pounding, where is the cure? the humans don't realize why they become infected with a need for my soul, so tragic, let me go i do not belong here... that laughter makes me cringe it doesn't belong here not tonight. i hope he's not long... i can't take the pounding why is that woman laughing... i need to feed tonight but that laughter paralyzes me my thoughts race.i am amused by how strange my body feels tonight... where do i belong? always somewhere in between

moon colored...

since I was a human child I have been completely in love with the Man in the Moon. He keeps me company at night, he always has and is the one consistent thing in my life. Souls come and go and gods come and go, but the moon is eternal, He never lets me go. This is a secret no human knows, but I speak to the Moon in my evenings, almost every evening. I learned early as a child that while most humans need sunlight, very few need moonlight as well. I am one of them. I could never stand to be captured or boxed, not without my Moon. Some humans see the Moon as feminine, Luna... maybe it is both, or neither... for me it goes back and forth, but either way does not really matter. The Moon is what I want it to be, something I've made up and chose to believe... it is mine and I will not give it up...

I wonder if he knows I saw him watching me today... I wonder if that poor wretch on the corner realizes she will soon become my feast... maybe I will take her slowly so that she might taste love once more. I do love them all, my precious victims, no matter how well I despise the human race, I show love to them all...

6.6.06

run little humans... where is he? he was supposed to be here by now! bloody hell! i will have to endure this damned day alone and for what? why go on.... no other choice given... just this

summer falls...

as the summer months encroach upon the humans, the smells overwhelm my senses. i chose to linger in the air to remove myself from their stench. i can't seem to find him as usual, always playing these trixie games. i'm sure he's in a bar somewhere enjoying himself while he taunts the females... they are drawn to him quickly, just as the males are drawn to me... but he sees them as mere play things, he has no mercy. i miss watching him feed, he gives me shivers, despite my inability to feel hot and cold any longer. i saw one of the elders last week, which kept me from checking in here... he was well, but frustrated in general over the simple things we cannot change. although our senses are greater and our abilities stronger, we are still binded by many human disadvantages. *sigh* i better move on before i am overcome by this smell and cannot feed at all...